Bob Hirschfeld on the ''Fatal Attraction'' divorce case

From:    Bob Hirschfeld
Subject: Re: Fatal Attraction

Now that the final decree has been signed, let me tell you about a case
that's in the public record in Marcopa County (AZ) Superior Court. It came
to be known as the "Fatal Attraction" divorce case on the 6th floor of the
courthouse. Mrs. P, a college professor, became aware that Mr. P, also a
college professor, had become involved with Ms. X, also a college
professor.

Among the things Mrs. P did:

* Suggestively answered EVERY male singles ad in one issue of the local
Singles paper, on behalf of Ms. X, resulting in a barrage of leering
telephone calls to Ms. X.

* Smashed Mr. P's windshield leaving the following note on the driver's
seat (I can reveal this because it's an exhibit publicly available in the
divorce):

		"Do you remember the movie `Fatal Attraction?' The boiled rabbit, the
		vandalized car, the suicide attempt? Remember these things and think
		of our love."

* There were, unbeknownst to each other, cross-petitions for Domestic
Violence Orders of Protection, resulting in the judge unwittingly granting
exclusive use of the family residence to *each party* in separate orders.
When an emergency hearing was held to sort this out, the judge became so
incensed that he uttered a pox on both of them, refused to rule, and urged
them each to get a running start to see who could take possession of the
house first. Mr. P arrived home earlier, changed the locks. Mrs. P later
attempted to have a locksmith change the locks while Mr. P was barricaded
in the house. The Seige went on for nearly a week.

* Forged Mr. P's signature to a huge promissory note payable to Mrs. P's
elderly mother. (It cost $500 for a handwriting expert to refute the
signature during the property division phase of the trial.) The expert
amused the court by pointing out that the forger had initially misspelled
the signature, then had gone back and corrected it.

* Charged huge quantities of unnecessary items to the community charge
accounts, and ran up other unfounded bills payable by Mr. P, during the
pendency of the divorce.

* Mrs. P refused to work during the divorce proceedings, and was given a
temporary division of the community income, with a requirement that she
prove what she was doing to seek employment. When Mrs. P was found to have
greater earning power than Mr. P (higher degrees) in the final trial, she
was denied a permanent spousal maintenance order. So she angrily fired her
lawyer, and was able to delay the signing of the final decree for many
months thereafter by various objections, thereby keeping up the temporary
flow of money from her husband and, of course, also delaying his marriage
to Ms. X.

I was Mr. P's lawyer in the "Fatal Attraction" divorce case. Mr. P paid his
bill. Mrs. P probably never will pay her lawyer.

Angry woman? This mild mannered, tweed-jacketed, pipe-puffing professor has
had nightmares of her popping up again, even though the final decree was
at last signed recently. Not from being drowned in a bathtub, as in the
movie, but surely from somewhere, to carry on the movie's plot.

Thank heavens, there were no minor children in this case.